WHO LIVES INSIDE YOUR HEART?
Call it the inner child or the heart, it's that inner voice we all hear throughout the day, the one we try to ignore, deny or repress. There is an abandoned part of us that isn’t waiting to grow up and figure out ‘what it wants to be.’  It already knows what it wants – to be set free. It wants us to listen so it can heal when it comes out of hiding.  It comes to us through our real feelings, our instincts, and intuitional flashes. It speaks to us by giving us pressure, a dull thud in our stomach, a pull on our heart strings; it comes to us through feelings.  You know – the ones you stuff, deny, ignore. But here’s the trouble with that and what you can do to turn those choices around and start a new life with greater results and intimacy and happiness than you ever realized possible.

WE'RE THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN ACCEPT OURSELVES
When we try to act a certain way to be acceptable to others, to not ‘rock the boat’ in a relationship that clearly needs deeper communication, we hide, or block our inner child.  Consequently other people never know us.    Lucia Capacchione says in her book, Recovery of Your Inner Child, “This makes it impossible to experience true intimacy with others. We never get to truly know each other… For us to be fully human, the child within must be embraced and expressed.”

When our energy is low we may have ignored our inner child.   Gloria was waiting for the phone to ring, hopeful for positive results of an audition she went on the day before.  When she didn’t get a call, she began to doubt herself, pick away at her performance, even though she had been excited and confident after she gave her all in the audition.   That’s the pressure we put on our inner child.  Gloria had danced in the audition, and she was 60 years old.  She was attractive and fit and when she got the call from her agent, she was excited and well prepared when she showed up at the large studio, filled with dozens of other women, some a decade younger.

GOTCHA!  CAUGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF HARSH SELF-TALK
So she was confused when her phone didn’t ring. There weren’t that many opportunities for older women.   She felt herself getting more frustrated, angry with herself, second guessing her performance.  Then she caught herself and stopped the negative self-talk. She could feel the results immediately in her body as she eliminated the pressure of second-guessing. “I did my best,” she told herself and took her dog for a walk on the beach, the went to a movie.  She made a  pact with herself that she would be happy no matter what happened.   She still dragged around, feeling fatigue.  She knew her body was slow to respond to the disappointment, yet it wasn’t over.  She was still hopeful. It hadn’t been that long, and they could still call… and she continued to nurture herself, feed her thoughts with positive memories of when she had successes in the past, replacing the images of negative memories with happy ones.  She danced around her apartment shaking her body, flinging her hair, singing, “I am a wild child.”  She still felt the fatigue of disappointment that comes from self-doubt, but she sang and danced anyway, coaxed her inner child to come out and play with her.

YOU'LL KNOW BY THE EVIDENCE...
The next day the phone did ring, and Gloria did get the gig.  She was going to dance on a video, and  get paid more than the two week’s salary she made on her day job..   She had a good talent agent, a background of preparation, a willingness to audition and go after her dream  of creating extra income through her talents and creative yearnings.  “It was a perfect opportunity for me,” she said. “It was like I somehow designed it in my head, then I just showed up and performed.”

Ask yourself, what do little children like to do? My child likes naps, and zero pressure.  Plenty of time to dream, read books, giggle at the funny faces of her dog and cat.  And ride horses, and kayak, swim, eat ice cream.  With zero pressure.  Go to movies, read, create something, cut paper dolls.  With  zero pressure. There’s still plenty of time for adult responsibilities and duties and jobs.  Just without the inner strife and anxiety that seems to accompany the idea of being adult.

Are you feeling stuck, do your dreams seem to far away?  Are you exhausted, nervous, worried, fearful, feeling hopeless? 

Step back; get to know your inner child.  He/she is in there waiting for your attention.  Maybe  you need to cry, wail, scream, hit a pillow, kick a box.  Sounds like your inner child is frustrated, angry, impatient.  No wonder you’re feeling blocked.  

The heart  only wants what it wants.  To be set free.